I love watching the Scripps Spelling Bee ... but the hardest thing to spell is most of the kid's names. WTF. (3 weeks ago)

lastes news&updates

Jun
6

and in conclusion pt. 7

Show me a salad bar and I’ll show you an old man going the wrong direction like a spawning salmon. Places like Ruby Tuesday’s should have a salad bar bear.   She never liked morning sex. She said her vagina always had a “left out all night” feel to it.   My grandma always used […]

Jun
5

and in conclusion pt. 6

People assume that famous people are more interesting. They are not. The terrible truth is that everybody and nobody is interesting.   If there was a hit TV show starring a hamster, most people would get all giddy about being in the same room with it. Over a fucking hamster.   It’s so cold out […]

Jun
4

and in conclusion pt. 5

Everyone has that one person in their past that has a weird effect on them. I’m no different. Sometimes when I think about her, it feels like my stomach is filled with butterflies. Other times, I simply shit myself.   “Where is it written that a man can’t smell musty?” After a moment he was […]

Jun
3

and in conclusion pt. 4

I detest dumb expressions like “You never learn anything doing something right.” No shit. You did it right. You didn’t need to learn anything.   I fear that if I awoke in the 1920s, I’d giggle every time someone used the word gay to mean happy.   I sounded by battle roar from my bed, […]

Jun
2

and in conclusion pt. 3

I sincerely believe that the current WWE champion should also serve as the US Ambassador to the United Nations.   I’m envious of the way the butter embraces the toast.   I don’t know how to define pornography but I know it when I see it every day.   I had a lot of dogs […]

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