(54 years ago)

news&updates

Jun
5

lost moments

(originally posted 6/29/2021)

 

As far as crimes go, it wasn’t one for the ages. Although it ended up on Detective Ages’ desk… so I guess it was. Soon he was seated across from a young female in the interrogation room. He’d wanted the room with the two-way mirror but that one was already occupied. There was nobody going to be on the other side of the mirror either way, but he felt just the fact there could be someone watching made the suspects more uneasy.

He liked them uneasy. That’s why he called it an interrogation room and not an interview room. He wasn’t looking to hire her.

The girl was in her late teens. Blonde, slim, probably quite popular at her high school. She was accused of attempting to steal a body from the morgue. Another teenager from a few counties away. Drowned in a boating accident. Tragic stuff.

Why she would want to steal his body was what he needed to find out.

He straightened his tie and slowly, dramatically opened the folder in front of him.

It worked. She began to tell him everything. “Just imagine how fast she would have spilled the beans if we were in the other interrogation room. I probably wouldn’t have had to straighten my tie” he thought to himself.

“It’s my parents fault. They wouldn’t let me have a pool party” she said as if it were an open and closed case. Before he went and arrested them Detective Ages thought he’d ask a follow up question.

“Why?”

Clearly she was not prepared for such a grilling. It took her a moment to compose herself. “Because for three years they wouldn’t let me invite my friends over to swim. They were scared of the liability. They were worried someone would drown. They’re so stupid.”

“The detective gave his best “I see” face and then prodded her to continue.

“So they finally agreed to let me have a pool party.”

“I thought you said they didn’t allow you to have a pool party” he countered.

“No, they did now. Just for the past three years they didn’t.”

Once again the “I see” face made an appearance. She continued without prodding.

“So I was mad and wanted to get back at them. So I was going to make it look like someone drowned at my party.”

The “I see” face was nowhere to be found. I’m guessing not even on your face. Detective Ages made a face very similar to the one you no doubt just made.

“How would that… why… would you….” was all he could get out.

“Duh” she said. Said like it explained everything and only a dolt of the highest magnitude would have any further questions.

Detective Ages closed the folder. Slowly but with significantly less drama.

Bingo.

She kept talking.

“I didn’t want to steal a corpse. I didn’t, I swear!” She broke down and started crying. “It’s just the kid next door, the one I’d planned on drowning at the party, wasn’t going to be home. He was going to be away this weekend. I needed a body! Can’t you see that?” She then proceeded to drop her head on the table with a dull thud. Spent.

Detective Ages reached down to once again open the folder. Dramatically.

Very dramatically.

So very dramatically.

It was really a shame that they weren’t in the other interrogation room and a double damn shame that someone else from the department wasn’t behind the glass to to see it.

It was easily the most dramatic opening of a folder that had ever taken place in the station.

And not a single eye would see it.

Wasted.

Lost forever.

like it, share it!

Join the discussion

*

The Forest of Stone

The Forest of Stone

Publication date: January 5, 2024
Category: Humor

$9.99
paperback buy
Free
ebook download
 

Broken World Stories

Broken World Stories

Publication date: April 1, 2022
Category: Humor

$9.99
paperback buy
Free
ebook download
 

Dizzying Depths

Dizzying Depths

Publication date: Jan 21, 2021
Category: Humor

$25.00
paperback buy
$3.99
ebook buy
 

Tales of Adventure with Nap Lapkin

Tales of Adventure with Nap Lapkin

Publication date: September 2019
Category: Humor

$10.00
paperback buy
Free
ebook download
 

neXt

neXt

Publication date: April 2019
Category: Humor

$10.70
paperback buy
Free
ebook download
 

What You Don’t Understand

What You Don’t Understand

Publication date: November 2015
Category: Humor

$9.99
paperback buy
Free
ebook download
 

The Song Between Her Legs

The Song Between Her Legs

Publication date: September 2014
Category: Humor

$9.99
paperback buy
Free
ebook download
 

The Ball Washer

The Ball Washer

Publication date: October 2012
Category: Humor

$9.99
paperback buy
Free
ebook download
 

Homo Sayswhaticus

Homo Sayswhaticus

Publication date: May 2013
Category: Humor

$9.99
paperback buy
Free
ebook download
 

The Trembling Fist

The Trembling Fist

Publication date: November 2013
Category: Humor

$9.99
paperback buy
$2.99
ebook buy
 

Merciful Flush: The Lance Manion Blogs

Merciful Flush: The Lance Manion Blogs

Publication date: May 2012
Category: Humor

$9.99
paperback buy
Free
ebook download
 

Results May Vary: The Lance Manion Blogs

Results May Vary: The Lance Manion Blogs

Publication date: May 2012
Category: Humor

$9.95
paperback buy
$3.95
ebook buy