prepare yourself for the coming Absurd World Order

The University of Pennsylvania has nominated a male swimmer, who competed as a woman, for the 2022 NCAA Woman of the Year award. Obviously this has caused a public outcry. The idea of electing a biological man as Woman of the Year is absolutely absurd. And only one of many such absurd things happening these days.

Which is why I’m rethinking my approach to this website.

Since I started sharing my dumb stories on this page I’ve usually felt a pang of sympathy for anyone unfortunate enough to stumble upon it. For the past ten years I’ve invested almost no time or effort in promoting the site or my books, because I know deep in my heart most of what I write makes very little sense. Not quite the ramblings of a madman, but definitely not a constructive use of a reader’s time.

Now I see it differently.

The sane masses need to start getting more comfortable with the absurd. They’ve had little time for it in their lives to this point and it makes them uneasy when they see it staring back at them. They don’t know how to react. They have been far too busy trying to make technological advances and furthering our understanding of science and medicine, to say nothing of paying their bills.

They no longer have that luxury.

Woke douchebags around the globe have somehow gained influence and started to shame people into silence whenever their latest cause offends people’s sensibilities.

The unhappy, angry and feckless have been racking up wins and it appears that they will be running the media, Hollywood and higher education for at least the foreseeable future.

People need to gradually acclimate themselves with complete nonsense. Like a diver coming up from the depths. Come up too fast and you risk getting the bends.

Speak out against these idiots and you risk a lot worse.

That’s where I can help. If people start to read the stuff that I post, they might develop a tolerance for stupidity.

My writing finally has a purpose.

I feel like I’ve found my calling. In the past few weeks alone I have inflicted on readers some of the most absurd imagery to ever grace the internet. Inoculating them against the coming Absurd World Order. All in 1000 words or less.

So for the first time ever, I’m asking you to find a particularly dumb story, there are plenty to choose from believe me, and then share it with a friend. The more stuffy and rigid in their beliefs the better. Make them read it… all the way to the end. Make sure they swallow that absurd pill. No hiding it under their tongue.

It might be their only hope.

I might be humanity’s best and last hope.

Which, of course, is absurd.