the Emperor’s new words

(originally posted 9/20/2020)

raise   /rāz/   verb   lift or move to a higher position or level

raze   /rāz/   verb   completely destroy

I’m calling bullshit on this second word.

There is no way that it was intended to mean both. It’s so obvious that somebody in a  position of authority somehow flubbed saying ‘raise’ in the right context and instead of admitting he fucked up he probably stood there fumbling around and finally spit out “I meant… razed… with a z. To tear down.” No doubt everyone who heard his original screw up glared at him and thought to themselves “Just admit it dude”, but as this individual had the power to lop off their heads if they disagreed or embarrassed him, everyone there had to just keep their mouths shut and accept it.

The birth of a new word.

What’s worse, I guarantee you that this same prick went around saying ‘razed’ every chance he could from then on just to make sure that people started to use the word. Galloping around and forcing it into every conversation, everyone within earshot knowing deep down that the guy was an asshat, but also knowing that if they piped up that their next barn raising would end up a barn razing.

The irony in the meaning of the words is painful. The perfect metaphor. It makes you want to jump back in time and raze a toast to this moron. The mug smashing into his dumb fat smug face.

Oh, he was overweight alright. You can wager on that.

Thank goodness that words and their meaning are no longer under assault from people in positions of authority these days right?