the many faces of fate

(originally posted 11/18/2017)

She was the most dangerous woman on the planet.

A wonderful first line for a story, but not really accurate.

Like the title.

It sounds like an awesome story but it really has nothing to do with the imminent narrative. I’m just sick of readers expecting great titles and great opening lines.

And when I said “imminent narrative” I actually typed “forthcoming story” but I didn’t want to use “story” for a second time in the same sentence so I used the Synonyms option on my Word program and got carried away so I synonymed “forthcoming” as well.

Readers want stories/narratives/tales/accounts that sound real and make sense, but when does life every really make sense let alone feel real? I would be a fraud trying to write better.

I was going to call the story “voices of the voiceless” the entire day until got home and in front of my laptop and at the last minute thought “the many faces of fate” sounded even better. Just like I was going to write about how I don’t understand how someone like Dave Matthews, who has written so many bad songs that the mind literally reels, can out of nowhere write something wonderful. You would think that someone brilliant enough to write titles like “voices of the voiceless” and “the many faces of fate” could come up with “But I do know one thing, that’s where you are is where I belong. I do know where you go is where I want to be” instead of just understanding perfectly what he means.

But no.

Dave Matthews and his band has littered the musical landscape with so many steaming piles of excrement that I long ago lost track of how many times I sprained my wrist lunging at the radio knob to change the station to avoid even one note of these searing loads of *Synonym has no suggestions* and if you expect me to move seamlessly to the point of this story from this observation then I ask you when the last time your life moved seamlessly anywhere. Even funeral processions get caught in traffic or get lost or lose cars along the way.

So if I mention that my wrist is still sore from lunging to change the station when I realized that I was singing I Wish You Were Here by Incubus at ten decibels to a certain girl, instead of just singing it, only to find the next station playing Wish You Were Here by Pink Floyd you’ll understand why the next station had to be playing Queen’s You’re My Best Friend.

And if you understand that you’re a better person than I am. I have no idea.

Maybe she is the most dangerous woman on the planet after all.

Maybe you deserve a story that sounds real and makes sense but you’ll just have to be happy with a great title and a great first line (as fraudulent as they are).

And, grudgingly, a little Dave Matthews.

I am no superman
I have no reasons for you.
I am no hero,
Aw that’s for sure,
But I do know one thing,
That’s where you are is where I belong.
I do know
Where you go, 
Is where I want to be.