What the fuck is wrong with black-enough people?

White people like me don’t understand black people. We don’t. We try and pretend we do but we don’t.

In 1996 Chris Rock offered us a flicker of hope when he did his courageous “Niggas Vs. Black People” routine. Eight minutes where he verbalized everything that white people like me were thinking but didn’t have the balls to say out loud. I think somewhere in the back of my head I expected it to be the start of some greater dialogue within the black community. I expected blacks everywhere to say to themselves and each other “Finally! Someone verbalized it. Now we can talk about the problem.”

Nope.

Now we sit in 2014 and things are worse than ever.

Then recently another brave black man steps up … Charles Barkley. A former basketball player. So now we have a comedian and a jock being the only people with the nerve to talk about the single most important issue in the black community these days. Sort of pathetic if you think about it.

For anyone who missed it, what Charles said was the following: “For some reason we are brainwashed to think, if you’re not a thug or an idiot, you’re not black enough. If you go to school, make good grades, speak intelligent, and don’t break the law, you’re not a good black person. There are a lot of black people who are unintelligent, who don’t have success. It’s best to knock a successful black person down because they’re intelligent, they speak well, they do well in school and they’re successful … it’s just typical B.S. that goes on when you’re black, man.”

White people everywhere held their breath and waited to see what the reaction would be.

We were once again disappointed.

What the fuck is wrong with black people? Every word he says was completely true. There is no argument against it and yet it came and went and nothing changed. Russell Wilson, QB of the Seattle Seahawks and the reason Mr. Barkley was waxing poetic on the topic to begin with, will continue to be labeled as “not black enough” simply because he’s a smart, successful man.

Then who the fuck would want to be a black man? I can’t imagine a more racist comment than saying someone isn’t “black enough” because they speak intelligently, go to college, get a job and don’t live a gangsta lifestyle.

Why isn’t it that men that drop out of school, commit crimes or abandon their children aren’t considered “black enough” by their peers?!

Charles, you are completely and gloriously black enough in my books.

Now we have Tim Scott becoming the first black man to win a Senate seat in the South since Reconstruction being called an “Uncle Tom” by his fellow blacks simply because they don’t agree with his politics! Who gives a shit if he’s a Democrat or Republican?! He’s the first black man to win a Senate seat in the South since 1881! Doesn’t the fact he grew up poor and in a single-parent household make him “black enough?” Nope. The self-proclaimed ‘victims’ of racism are the first ones to show their true colors when someone of color succeeds.

I guess the bigger question is why the black community continues to let the morons control the dialogue on race. Where are all the black business leaders and celebrities to wrestle away the influence of such social parasites such as Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson? Scumbags who claim to be the voice of the ‘civil rights movement’ but instead just line their own pockets at the expense of their own people. How did MSNBC ever give a divisive dolt like Sharpton a show in the first place? Why is it that everyone knows the names of thugs like Trayvon Martin and Michael Brown but can’t name a single innocent black man or woman who died because of the endless violence in our cities? Are we to believe that Trayvon and Michael are the best that the black community can offer? It seems like a scenario concocted by the KKK but it’s our bizarro-world reality.

I appreciate that just as blacks can’t imagine how whites see the world the same is true about whites understanding what it’s like to be black. Blah blah blah. Honestly, I don’t give a flying shit anymore. I’m just sick of feeling awkward every time one of these hot-button issues comes up in a mixed gathering and everyone shuts up because we’re all supposed to immediately regurgitate our race’s take on whatever the topic is. Blacks need to start handling their shit and rejecting this whole “black enough” bullshit. It’s a lie told by the ignorant and peddled by a demented media. They can’t continue to let the morons at the bottom bring everyone else down.

To paraphrase Chris Rock, too many blacks want to “Keep it real. Real dumb.”

Something has to change and, however uncomfortable the initial conversations may be, I’d like to suggest it be what is considered “black enough.”